You may have heard the phrase expectations are pre-meditated resentments.  It's a little like scripting how someone else will behave without them having a copy of the script.  How can they possibly know how you are expecting them to react?  And why should they know?  They don't have a crystal ball!  And yet we often expect them to know exactly how we want them to behave.

This topic came up for me recently and I realized that with certain relationships in my life (read spouse, close friends, and family) I often decide ahead of time how things will go down.  Now I don't mean I sit and deliberate about it consciously.  It's more of an act of my subconscious mind.  The subconscious brain automatically fills in the blanks of the rest of the story based on past trauma and events.  It is a recipe for disaster!

It feels like I blink and the pattern is set.  My husband will come into the house and I will ask him something and he doesn't...

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